“She thinks she can turn you on in this way”
Women get weird, stupid, and annoying ideas from the magazines that they read when it comes to how to turn us on. It’s a really nice idea that women want to make sure that they please their men but sometimes they run out of real ideas. That’s when magazines start telling their readers to put a finger in her man’s butthole. What possesses them to do this, we will never know. What’s even worst is that if you tell her to lay of the butt-lovin’ she’s going to get offended and not want to try sexual things with you ever again. You’ve got to take a delicate approach to dealing with the supposed “turn-ons” she has in store for you.
The Finger in the Butt
“What is she trying to do?”
A fair amount of guys wish that they could have some sort of anal sex with their lady. But when they’re thinking that,most likely they’ll want to be the pitcher. The idea of a woman’s perfectly manicured finger going up your poop-chute is not something most men desire. Hopefully she mentions doing this before it happens. If she hasn’t then feel free to tell her that it’s not cool to pull something like that off without talking to you first. If she’s had the talk with you and expects an answer then tell her no (we’re assuming for this article that you aren’t into that sort of thing). But the delicate version would be: “I really love that you’re trying so hard to keep things exciting for us, but I’d rather do something else, like…” This is where you get to suggest the fantasy that you want to pull off.
She Gives Weird Blowjobs
Blowies are one of the greatest gifts known to man and we are always thankful when a woman wants to put our dick in her mouth. But sometimes a woman will come along who just gives the weirdest blowjobs. She’ll grate her teeth on you, lick it like a lollipop, or even sucks on your head when it’s too sensitive. She might not notice that she’s doing these things, or (more likely) thinks that she’s turning you on. Again, if your girlfriend or hook-up is doing this she doesn’t mean any harm. She’s just not all that educated in the art of the blowie. Instead of giving her a rundown of what you like and dislike, praise her during the act when she gets it right. “I love it when you…” or “It feels so good when you…” That way you’re noticing what she’s doing and giving her a good report. She won’t feel like you’re hating what’s going on and that she’s a complete failure.
The hardest part about telling a woman that her attempts at being sexy aren’t working are by knowing that she’s really sensitive. If you ever say “I don’t like that” she might cry or yell on you just because it feels like a personal attack on her. Use your nicest words to tell her to fix that shit.